


“Stop talking.”

by ragingred



Series: Tumblr Prompts [7]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: And Jason's not having his bs, But instead of misuse of idioms this one's about stupid mind-blowing facts, Established Relationship, M/M, This one's kind of similar to 'cry me a river', Well Tim's just stating facts that we're not aware of in a way
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-21
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-08-05 06:44:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16362875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ragingred/pseuds/ragingred
Summary: “Stop talking,” he grumbled lowly with eyes closed and that was when Tim finally laughed. “Yeah, you go laugh your pretty face off, Timmers,” his tone held no bite though.





	“Stop talking.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, I'm sorry for the super late update. To put it simply, I had midterms so you can guess what happened the past few weeks.
> 
> Anyway, I saved most of the words from Tumblr because let's face it, Tumblr's like that and most of us are just trapped in Tumblr and its madness.
> 
> I'll probably update the Fem!Tim later at night, just a heads up I guess if you're interested.
> 
> This fanfiction is unbeta-ed and since English isn't my native language, expect grammatical errors and typos. Also, they might be OOC so I hope you'll forgive me for it and if you don't like it, please don't read it, in fact, just close the tab immediately, please and thank you.
> 
> Without further ado, I hope you enjoy it, even a little.

Recently, Tim had been talking nonstop. Well, he had been pointing out some weird facts out of the blue and it kept on catching Jason off-guard. He had become accustomed to Tim saying weird shits for the past few years but lately he had been a lot more talkative.

Jason was flipping some pancakes when Tim’s voice echoed throughout the kitchen. “Waffles are just pancakes with abs,” _what the fuck?_

He slowly turned around to face the younger man with his eyebrows furrowed with a confused expression on his face. “What brought this on?” he couldn’t help but to huff a small laughter though.

“Just a random thought,” Tim confessed whilst diverting his gaze away from him.

Jason kept an eye on him for several seconds before putting the pancake to the stack of pancakes on the counter. “I swear to Wonder Woman there’s something wrong with your coffee,” he said while shaking his head.

Tim just quirk him a small smile with a roll of his eyes.

“Just eat your damn pancakes, Timbers,” and with a ruffle onto his hair, Jason sat across from him and dig into his pancakes.

* * *

The next time it happened, they already had their breakfast and Tim had his second cup of coffee in his hands – looking very deeply in thought.

“Do you ever think about how your skeleton is always wet?”

Jason spewed his tea and coughed harshly. Okay, that clearly caught him off guard. “Tim what the actual fuck?” he wheezed.

Tim only shrugged his shoulders innocently and fiddled his fingers against his mug of coffee.

Jason stared at him incredulously and shook his head. What had his life come to, really?

“That’s pretty disturbing actually,” Jason said with a grimace.

“You’re inside of your skeleton, you’re a brain,” Tim continued and the urge to shut Tim up was very strong in that moment.

So he did, smacking his wet lips onto Tim’s cheek and earning himself a disgusted screech.

* * *

Then there was that time with them staying over at Dick’s place.

Dick himself was spooning himself a spoonful of cereal when Tim opened his mouth. Jason expected him to say something that would make Dick stop eating his cereal.

“Spoons are just little bowls on sticks.”

Dick looked like he was scandalized and he even stopped chewing. But he just tried to shake that fact off and hesitantly continued on eating his cereal.

Jason was sure he was _really_ close to stop eating his cereal. He must’ve felt very confused and disturbed early in the morning.

“Trees grow in the air,” that though, _that_ was enough for Dick to stop eating his cereal.

Dick pushed the bowl away from him and Jason took it from him. Free food.

* * *

Another one with Damian.

“If you step on a person’s foot, they open their mouths, just like trash cans,” Damian turned his head slowly to look at Tim.

Damian opened his mouth then closed it halfway through with a frown on his forehead. He glared at the ground; Jason guessed he was planning to step on Tim’s foot to prove his point but it never came.

Instead, Damian just looked at Tim straight in the eyes, Tim who was staring at the sandwich Alfred made for lunch. Damian scoffed and rolled his eyes at Tim, “This is what you use your intelligence for, Drake,” he shook his head.

“It is,” was all Tim said with a shrug and Damian let out a small _‘tt’_.

“Of course it is, the ridiculous things you think about in that brain of yours,” Damian shook his head and huffed.

“Also, if you think about it, snakes are just tails with faces,” Tim then glanced elsewhere.

Damian had a murderous look painted over his face for a slight second and if Jason had looked away, he would’ve had missed the spark of interest and – awe? In Damian’s emerald green eyes.

Huh. Would you look at that?

* * *

“Okay, let’s get this over with,” Jason took off his Red Hood gear, letting them fall to the floor and then flopped down onto the sofa.

Tim raised an eyebrow at Jason at that, blinking twice before his eyebrows narrowed ever so slightly, “O – kay?” he said with a confused tone whilst taking off his Red Robin gear also.

“What kind of crazy fact that will blow the humanity’s mind do you have for me, Timothy?” Jason leaned back to the sofa and crossed his arms against his chest, chin tipped upwards with a raised eyebrow as Tim sat beside of him.

Tim seemed to think for a while before he opened his mouth, “There’s no real reason the alphabet needs to be in order,” Jason thought he was ready but boy was he wrong.

Jason opened his mouth to say something – but then clamped it shut. He made a gesture for Tim to go on and cupped his chin as he stared at Tim who was sporting a poker face look on his face.

“Bricks are domesticated rocks.”

Jason’s breath hitched, he wouldn’t know how long he could listen to Tim’s mind-blowing facts or just random shits. He could do this, he had dealt with things a lot worse concerning Tim. _He could fucking do this_.

“Water’s not wet,” Jason choked on _air_.

“How the fuck is water not wet it’s fucking _water_ ,” okay, that was probably the line of how much bullshit coming from Tim he could take. But seriously though, water? Not wet? _What the actual fuck?_

“The definition of wet itself is covered or saturated with water or another liquid so in case it’s possible to splash water droplets onto water where you can see the water droplets sitting on the water then you can say that that water is wet,” he ended his words with a shrug of his shoulders.

Jason noted how Tim would usually do that after saying these weird facts. He squinted his eyes suspiciously at Tim, silence enveloping them for several seconds before Jason rubbed his temples.

Before he could say anything, the small pitter patter sound of rain hit their windows erased the silence stretched between them. Tim glanced to the window and Jason prepared himself for what he was about to say.

“What if rain came down all at once and not in tiny rain drops,” it was a rhetorical question and Jason should’ve seen that coming.

He didn’t answer him, too busy imagining the amount of water coming from the sky hitting the city’s buildings and crushing everything – Jason shuddered and tried hard to erase the image from his head.

“Time to sleep, Timmy,” Jason got up from the sofa, lifting Tim up and carrying him over his shoulder to the bedroom in peace.

“Jason, I am capable of walking to the bedroom,” Tim deadpanned though he didn’t resist and just let Jason carry him.

“Who knows what you’ll think about on your way to the bedroom,” Jason shrugged his free shoulder and lied Tim down on the bed.

“Shouldn’t we change our clothes or something?”

Jason lied beside Tim and pulled the covers over their bodies. “Tim, just shut up and go to sleep,” he grumbled under his breath, already closing his eyes along the way.

Tim pressed his lips into a thin line as Jason tucked him under his chin and huffed, wrapping his arms around Jason’s torso and burying his nose against Jason’s warm and beating chest. His sigh was muffled by Jason’s Kevlar when Jason draped an arm over his waist.

It was not a few seconds later before Tim’s voice brought Jason out of his dreamland. “Bruce rhymes with juice,” it was a bit unintelligible but Jason could still hear him pretty clearly and for fuck’s sake he was trying to _sleep_.

“Jesus fucking _Christ_ ,” Jason hissed and he could feel Tim’s body shaking, he was probably holding back his laughter.

“Stop talking,” he grumbled lowly with eyes closed and that was when Tim finally laughed. “Yeah, you go laugh your pretty face off, Timmers,” his tone held no bite though.

“You love me,” Jason silenced him by kissing him fully on the lips.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own any of the characters mentioned above, I only own my writing and that's about it probably.
> 
> Comments, kudos, bookmarks, basically anything is greatly appreciated.
> 
> Thank you for reading and let's meet in another fanfiction!


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